While it can seem like winning the lottery gives you better odds than finding and maintaining a love that lasts a lifetime, there are some indicators which have been scientifically linked to long, happy marriages. You probably know that keeping up a decent sex life, maintaining trust and being compassionate are essential to the longevity your marriage, but you might be surprised to learn some of the more recent scientific findings of what makes a happy marriage. Here are some indicators that you and your partner are headed toward matrimonial bliss.
1. Thrifty Wedding
While you may have been dreaming of a big (expensive) wedding, it’s important to keep in mind that couples who celebrate their nuptials in a more financially sensible way tend to stay married. Spending more than about $20,000 was linked with divorce rates roughly three to four times as high as those with weddings in the $5,000-$10,000 range.
2. Online Introduction
According to some recent studies, couples who first met online enjoyed lower rates of divorce and were more satisfied with their marriages. Don’t be afraid to brag about your happy marriage and meeting your significant other online!
3. Keep Social Media In Its Place
Using social media sites too much can actually increase your dissatisfaction with your marriage. Increased social media usage may also result in higher rates of divorce, with nearly a third of social media users saying they had contemplated leaving their partners, as compared to less than 20% of those who did not use social media.
4. Taking In Movies Together
For couples who watch movies together, discussing the relationships between the characters gives them a safe framework for discussing their own relationship in a more open manner. By watching movies together and discussing the characters and their relationships, couples enjoyed reduced divorce rates by about one-half. For couples seeking a happy marriage, it’s hard to beat taking in a movie or two.
5. Positive Attention
When your partner is interrupting your reading with a random comment, they aren’t trying to make you laugh; they’re trying to get you to pay attention to them. Beware of constantly rebuffing them and telling them you’re busy; you could be doing irreparable long-term damage to your relationship.
6. Pluralistic Arguments
When the inevitable arguments pop up, it’s important to remember that, for a happy marriage, using words like “we” and “us” is far more productive than using words like “me”, “I” and “you”. Using individual pronouns leads to divisive thinking while using plural pronouns leads to cooperative thinking.
7. Seeing Each Other With Starry Eyes
When you view your partner through rose-colored glasses, it may help to keep your happy marriage on track. If you see your partner through starry eyes and think very highly of them, you’re less likely to get divorced and more likely to be blissfully happily married. A happy marriage is easier when you’re willing to be happy with one another.