Should you really ask for money as a wedding gift? Historically, wedding gifts were intended to help a young couple set up their new home together, filling in empty cabinets and sparsely-decorated areas.
Today, however, as the average age of newlyweds rises, and more and more people have an established home together before they are married, more stuff to fill their home is the last thing many couples couple want.
While asking for money as a wedding gift is more practical, it can be awkward to address this request with your guests, which is why we have provided this easy guide on how to ask for money as a wedding gift.
1. The Invitation Is Not the Place
While it may seem like a good idea to simply be upfront about your desire for money wedding gifts rather than material objects, it’s the best practice to leave these details out of the invitation. Unless you’re clarifying that you don’t want a gift of any sort, mentioning gifts in the invitation can come off as rude and presumptuous, putting pressure on guests who may not be able to afford to bring a gift. You are inviting people to your wedding for the pleasure of their company, not for the gifts that they might bring, so try to keep any talk of money or gifts away from the invitation.
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2. You Should Still Have A Registry
You will always have guests who are uncomfortable giving money as a wedding gift, or who think they are tacky, so it is a smart idea to have a small backup registry so that they can buy you a gift that they feel good about, and that you’ll like, too. There are many out-of-the-ordinary places to register, like camping stores and game shops, so you can still get a gift you’ll love, even if it’s not the cash you’d prefer.
3. Let Your Bridal Party And Family Know
If guests don’t know what to get you as a wedding present, they will ask you, your family, or a member of your bridal party for information, so having these people to advocate for your gift choices is a good step towards getting money as a wedding gift instead of a third toaster. Since you’ll also have your backup registry, these people have the ability to say, “I think they’d prefer cash, since they’re saving up for a new house, but if you’d rather get them a gift, I know they have a registry at __________.”
4. Money Registries
To address the issues that some couples face when it comes to asking for money as a gift for their wedding, several companies have stepped up to offer registry services that essentially collect cash and deliver it to you, minus a service fee. Honeymoon registries offer items for purchase such as “A Night on the Town” or “A Couple’s Massage”, allowing your guests and well-wishers to pay for a part of your honeymoon instead of offering a gift. There are other registries that allow your guests to buy other “gifts”, such as portions of a down payment or a renovation of your existing home.
Hopefully, we gave you some ideas on how to ask for money as a wedding gift, so don’t be afraid, do it, and buy the things you really want!